7 posts tagged “rant”

The Parable of the Lost Son

 ¹¹Jesus continued: "There was a man who had two sons. ¹²The younger one said to his father, 'Father, give me my share of the estate.' So he divided his property between them.

 ¹³"Not long after that, the younger son got together all he had, set off for a distant country and there squandered his wealth in wild living. ¹⁴After he had spent everything, there was a severe famine in that whole country, and he began to be in need. ¹⁵So he went and hired himself out to a citizen of that country, who sent him to his fields to feed pigs. ¹⁶He longed to fill his stomach with the pods that the pigs were eating, but no one gave him anything.

 ¹⁷"When he came to his senses, he said, 'How many of my father's hired men have food to spare, and here I am starving to death! ¹⁸I will set out and go back to my father and say to him: Father, I have sinned against heaven and against you. ¹⁹I am no longer worthy to be called your son; make me like one of your hired men.' ²⁰So he got up and went to his father.
      "But while he was still a long way off, his father saw him and was filled with compassion for him; he ran to his son, threw his arms around him and kissed him.

 ²¹"The son said to him, 'Father, I have sinned against heaven and against you. I am no longer worthy to be called your son.^[a]'

 ²²"But the father said to his servants, 'Quick! Bring the best robe and put it on him. Put a ring on his finger and sandals on his feet. ²³Bring the fattened calf and kill it. Let's have a feast and celebrate. ²⁴For this son of mine was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found.' So they began to celebrate.

 ²⁵"Meanwhile, the older son was in the field. When he came near the house, he heard music and dancing. ²⁶So he called one of the servants and asked him what was going on. ²⁷'Your brother has come,' he replied, 'and your father has killed the fattened calf because he has him back safe and sound.'

 ²⁸"The older brother became angry and refused to go in. So his father went out and pleaded with him. ²⁹But he answered his father, 'Look! All these years I've been slaving for you and never disobeyed your orders. Yet you never gave me even a young goat so I could celebrate with my friends. ³⁰But when this son of yours who has squandered your property with prostitutes comes home, you kill the fattened calf for him!'

 ³¹" 'My son,' the father said, 'you are always with me, and everything I have is yours. ³²But we had to celebrate and be glad, because this brother of yours was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found.' "

My sister is not yet found as the youngest son is at the end of this passage. She is still out squandering property with prostitutes, as the passage refers. I relate very much so with the oldest here - go figure, I am the oldest child, duh - but I still find it unfair that the "fattened calf" was not slaughtered for the merriment of the oldest.

I guess in the case that the youngest came back home and was "lost and is found" in the end, yes, there's reason for celebration; if my sister turned to God and completely turned a new leaf, I would understand. It would be deserved. But she has not yet done so, and still I sit here in the shadow of that Princess; I respect my parents, I do whatever I can to please them, and I still feel like #2.

Lately the problems between my parents, my sister and myself have greatly upset me. BADLY. I don't have a regular eating schedule or a proper diet, I don't ever sleep anymore. I almost never work, which is also cause for my distress (I'm always more happy when I feel productive and can take care of myself), but my main stressing factors lie in my home... my resentment toward my spoiled sister, that treats everyone as if she is royalty and the world is her servant; my upset with my parents at their inability to do anything about it, let alone give me a larger room that I deserve to have and would take better care of...

My sister plans to breed her dog. She has no means of taking care of a pregnant dog, let alone the knowledge, financial ability, or responsibility to do so. This will HURT THE DOG if she breeds her, because she will be neglected and hurting. She might even die if she gives birth. Finally we have an appointment to get the dog fixed and get her the rabies shot she's never had. She's never even been to a vet for shots, because my sister has not allowed my parents to do so, nor has she done it herself. I called the vet to ask about "what IF the dog is bred? will it harm her to still get her fixed?" and the vet was very positive and helpful. The dog will not be harmed AT ALL if she's fixed and has been bred, it would just cost a bit more to do the procedure.

That's a relief. I'm really happy to know that. There would be no homes for these puppies, and my sister thinks it will get her money to have puppies. Are you kidding me? They won't even be two steps away from purebred dogs, and mutt-puppies will NOT bring in money!!!

Oh well. I am happy that at least THAT problem is being resolved. It won't even be extremely expensive to do so.. I'm so happy about that. The dog will be safer this way, and maybe my sister will be so angry she won't come home anymore.

Last night my mom told me that my sister is planning on moving back home, again; I spent the rest of the night crying in my room. I am still under stress when she's not here, but for her to come back? And have to deal with that wretched girl daily again? The way she treats me, my parents; the way she disrespects the house and everything in it...... I am so sick of dealing with it. If I had a way out of this house, I'd take it; but I don't. I have no money - I work two days a week now - and I have no one to stay with. No where to go. Nothing.

Sigh. My mom SAYS she's going to just tell my dad that I'm moving back into that room. I asked her what she'd do if I just moved back in myself without saying anything to my dad; we agreed he'd probably want to kick me out because he'd be so angry that I did such a thing without his permission. I agree. It's disrespectful, but I see no other way. So she said instead of ruffling already aroused feathers, she'd just tell him it was happening. No discussion, no more delays; I deserve, and she'll give the reasons why.

I hope it works. I hope she means it this time. I am so unhealthy living in this tiny room; it is so small that I'm claustrophobic in it, and it never gets clean because I have too much stuff (that I use daily, mind you; I have already moved everything unnecessary out of this room and into storage). I can't live like this. I'm a neat freak and this is driving my OCD wild.

Well this entry is long enough. Bleh.

1. Really..seriously.. clean your room. I know it doesn't get much more clean than this, but try? Please?

2. Make Valentine's Day Cookies.

3. BTW, in order to make said cookies, you need a cookie cutter. Go buy one.

4. Please find a second job. :-( 14 hours a week for only $8.50 an hour isn't going to cut it, and even 20 hours a week is just skimping by.

5. Pray a bit more for that new job. I know you have trouble praying for YOURSELF for things, but you should do it.

6. Secretly come up with SOME kind of a devious no-fail plan to get your old room/your undeserving sister's room back. It's huge. It's just the right size to put your stuff in to and even get your comfy bed from storage - you'd actually sleep at night! WOW!

7. Cancel number six, because it ain't happenin'.

8. Try to find out why your little boy kitty won't clean his butt as nicely as your little girl kitty does. He smells of poo.

9. Make dinner tonight.

10. Clean ferret box.

11. GO FOR A LONG WALK BECAUSE YOU'RE TUBBY.

12. .....get some coffee, because caffeine sounds like just the pick-me-up your lethargic attitude needs. :-D

13. Cancel number 12, make it better: go french press yourself some coffee, lazy ass. :-D

The end. I'm bored and really need inspiration to do ANYTHING right now. I'm not in the mood for diddly squat. I just want to lay in bed. I'm pretty upset about not being able to afford my bills... I'm going to run out of money in the next week and a half.

Sigh.

I really hate living here.

I really hate living with my family.

I really hate my sister. No, I'm not joking or exaggerating.

She is threatening to have her friends beat my ass. Why? Because I told her she was rude and horrible for coming home and disrespecting me in front of them - people I don't know - and she disrespects everyone in this house.

So she tells me to die a "painfull lonley death" and threatens to have her friends kick my ass for calling her immature when she sent that.

What do my parents do?

Nothing.

What does my dad say?

That he doesn't know both sides of the story yet.

WHAT OTHER SIDE IS THERE? This girl steals from you, lies, breaks any and all rules you provide for her because she doesn't give a crap who she hurts or who gets upset as long as it's all done her way and she gets what she wants. And you want her side???????? Are you KIDDING me?

Not to mention... THE WHOLE DAMN THING IS IN MY CELL PHONE VIA TEXT MESSAGES!! All of it!! Including what I sent her! Read it ALL, it'll be exactly like I friggin' told you it was!

WHY would I lie about this?
WHY would he doubt me?
WHY does he need to hear her side when he KNOWS she's a worthless piece of lying, junkie-friend-having crap?
WHY does he still favor her when she is such a horrible person?

No, this is not "sisterly love", for anyone reading this that doesn't know me. There is sisters not getting along because they're sisters, and then there's sisters not getting along because the youngest sibling is a waste of air for doing such horrible things to the people that care for and about her.

When does this end? When can I leave? Why can't I leave now? WHY am I in this HORRIBLE situation that I can't move away from or get out of, and no one other than me sees that it needs to change? WHY do my parents just brush off her mistreatment of us like it's ok? It's NOT ok, get your asses out of denial.

I want to cry and sleep all day. But I can't. Because I have to go to work. And I don't want to. I just want to be far, far away from here.

I HATE this.

It's too early! Normally I'm a morning person. BRING ON THE MORNINGS! But today... my slight cramps mixed with the fact that my  bed was just so much warmer than the rest of the house appears to be..

Yeap, definitely too early. Unforgivably early. Or so it seems for now.

I'm definitely going to be making some sugar cookies for Valentine's day!! Anna always makes her treats look so delectable, and I'm going to snag the Valentine heart cookies from her little blog and bake up a storm. They're adorable.. though I think I might try some marbled effect on the icing instead, just to save time. The faster they dry, the faster I can get them out of this house and that wretched kitchen. Then I can take them to people :-D

I absolutely hate it when restaurants will not split bills. Absolutely hate it. I was once a server/waitress, whatever you want to call it, and I understand the slight stress it causes for splitting bills.

However, when people go to a restaurant and it's a big group of people, they're almost always going to pay in different ways. It's expected. It causes a lot of problems when they won't split the fucking bills because someone is always left high and dry with a larger bill than they should have, and the tip is normally smaller than it should have been.

If everyone got their own separate bills, everyone would see their own charges and be responsible for it. There'd be no covering an extra five or ten dollars for the actual bill that someone was short on and then left early for, and there'd be no one left in the end trying to cover everything missing - including the tip.

I don't agree with automatic gratuity either, but fine, whatever, charge the automatic percentage on to everyone's SEPARATE bills. This way, they'd get the appropriate amount for each bill from each party, and everyone is held responsible.

If I had a choice, I would never eat at restaurants that don't split bills for people. It's absolute bullshit.

It's official - we're going to have cable.

For those that aren't aware, I have been struggling for the past week to get cable. I called last Wednesday and scheduled for Direct TV through Qwest; they were supposed to come connect on Friday. They didn't show. I spoke with a manager, screamed and complained, got it re-scheduled for Saturday. Both of these days were supposed to have been between 3-4pm, according to Qwest.

They didn't show again. Got in contact with DirectTV rather than Qwest, apparently they showed up at noon on Saturday. Not only that, but they called whatever make-believe number that Qwest set up for our internet. We don't have an actual phone, so the phone number, of course, didn't ring or work. So not only did they show up early, but they called the WRONG number - we have contact numbers listed for a reason, and yet they still called that.

I called and complained again. Some woman gave me attitude. We cancelled the set-up, but then another woman was really nice... so we re-scheduled. Turns out they showed up this morning, and we can't even HAVE DirectTV because our apartment doesn't face south. What kind of reason is that? You shouldn't limit your client services to apartments that only face south; since we can't mount the dish on top of the apartment building or side, we couldn't get it.

So that idea went out the window.

I was looking at the other option we have in our area - which isn't normally the case, since most places in Phoenix, AZ are limited to either Qwest or Cox; our apartment is randomly zoned for both - and priced everything online. I was satisfied with what I saw.

We are officially set up for installation of Cox Digital Cable with the "sports tier" added on to that, AND DVR. All of this is going to run us approximately $65 a month. It's a bit high, but it's worth it. After not having cable for a full year living here, it's a nice idea to go ahead and get it.

Besides.. for me, it's only $33... we're splitting it in half. So really, it's not even a big bill at all.

Joy.

So, in light of the experience with trying to set this up, I would just like to say... Aside from the ONE NICE WOMAN I spoke to at Qwest, the customer service was horrible. Their communication between their company and DirectTV is horrible. DirectTV has a 4-hour window that you must be available for hooking things up, and Qwest only communicates that you have the option of whatever time you need. Not only that, but somewhere in the mix, the field technician ended up with a FAKE phone number that we clearly did not provide for call-back.

As far as Cox is concerned... the only negative thing I had with them, is I was on hold for like 13-15 minutes before someone actually answered in their customer service center. Also, it was pretty funny, but while I was on hold... someone answered the phone, greeted me indirectly, and immediately requested that I hold again. Pretty weird - why not just leave someone on hold then? Oh well. OTHER THAN THAT, the phone set-up was ABSOLUTELY SMOOTH. It was so easy. Of course, if there are any other problems, I will update accordingly...

...But for now... Cox is definitely winning as far as service goes. That's just my opinion of it all, though.

I went across the street and got lunch because I was starving - there's this place that I go to maybe once a week, or every other week. It's called George's Lunchbox. They have really good sandwiches, and I order the same thing everytime: What they call a Supreme.

Bacon, avocado, turkey. My choice of cheese: Provolone. I get mayo+mustard, on marbled rye bread. It's pretty damn good, comes with lettuce and tomato, no onions.

Honestly, one of the best sandwiches ever. However, today I got back to work and realized she messed it up.

It didn't have any cheese.

It didn't have mustard.

It didn't taste the same because of that.

I personally don't like mayo when it's alone; I don't like the fatty, greasy/creamy feeling in my mouth, nor do I like the flavor... but I was so damn hungry and I figured, "Hey, everything else is yummy!" so I ate it.

Mistake on my part.

I now feel a little sick to my stomach. It doesn't feel very happy in there right now at all. Talking makes me want to puke.

Sigh.